This weekend I attended an event called “The Questival” at Regent’s University. This event is a one day event hosted by Trevor Silvester for Quest Cognitive Hypnotherapists (and other hypnotherapists) to give us a chance to get together, add to our learning, and be inspired.
Trevor usually speaks on a subject and there are guest speakers.
I was very excited this year. I miss going down to London for my course. I miss the connection and learning new and interesting stuff.
I sat in Regent’s park with my latte for an hour just chilling and chatting to the wildlife – like this little fellow who seemed determined to have my latte! I could understand if it was a hazelnut latter but it wasn’t.
It’s a great place to ground yourself.
As I await a decision on the court case from the CPS I am in a fairly reflective mood too.
There, on the bench, I remembered the weekends of my training. They often came after a session with Trevor where my mind was a tumultuous mess as I tried to make sense of changes. I remember one particular conversation as I walked through the park with Trevor where he told me that one day, I would look back on what had happened to me and be able to see what I’d learnt from it.
I scoffed at the thought at the time. As I shut down into the blackness of my head Trevor distracted me by pointing out a heron. It seemed such a crazy idea.
But he was right. Of course. He so often is.
Now, it is true that I can reflect on what I’ve learned. I reflect on how it brought me to this point – to where I am now. I now do what I love. I have a life I love. And as I see more and more clients, I am able to use my experiences to help them. Not to empathise with them – but to guide them to the other side of their problem in the most effective way.
Because of what happened to me, I can do this.
And that means I did learn something from what happened and I can reflect back without needing to go into that dark place.
On Saturday, as I stepped into the room that was so familiar from 10 weekends of training, I felt the familiar knot in my stomach.
“I don’t belong here” a voice in my head said.
“I am different” it said.
“I can’t cope with this” it said “I am screwed up”
“That’s not true” I answered. And I let the thoughts go.
It is no longer true that I am different. What is now true is that we are all different and that’s what makes us interesting.
(Picture by Chloe Ridgway)
I looked around at people in a new light.
For the first time I could see other people’s insecurities and I felt comfortable whether I was stood on my own or in a crowd.
I caught up with old friends and made new ones. When people commented that they recognised me from my posts on our discussion forum I smiled and took it as a compliment rather than feeling the need to apologise.
I was comfortable just being me.
I learnt so much from that day. From the talks and from being the me I am now.
And then Dave Cornthwaite came on to talk
He talked about how he gave up the rat race at 25 to break a record by skateboarding across Australia. He talked about doing 25 1000km journeys on non-motorised transport.
He talked about freedom. He talked about saying yes. He talked about living without limitations. You can find his Facebook page here. He’s worth following.
It inspired many to question what they do day in day out and if they are happy with it. It inspired people to travel. He talked about having a bucket list and doing it.
I loved his talk. It was entertaining and wonderful to share in his passion and experience.
It didn’t inspire me.
I don’t need inspiring.
I don’t have a bucket list because if I want to do something I do it. I don’t need permission. I don’t need to let go of limitations.
Anyone who knows me knows, if I have an idea, I do it. I don’t wait. I act.
And I dream big. I often imagine an interview with Oprah or Ellen these days. My book will be on bookshelves within months. I expect it to be big. I expect to be doing talks worldwide.
I dream big. I act big. I act.
So my life is heading exactly where I want it to go and I couldn’t be happier.
That’s what I learnt this weekend, more than anything else.
I am doing what I love and loving what I do.